VM10220 Minions, Underlings and other employees, how to deal with.
VM10320 Basic Science.
VM10410 Tutorial.
VM10510 History of evil overlords.
VM10610 Evil Overlords and the media.
VM10710 Key Skills.
VM10820 Life and times of well known Evil Overlords
VM10910 Hides out, Bases and other islands.
VM20110 Evil Over lordship the facts.
VM20220 Henchmen and trusted lieutenants, an in-depth study.
VM20320 Mad Science.
VM20410 Tutorial.
VM20510 Advance manic laughter, and other language skills.
VM20610 High level offence action, from tribes to solar systems.
VM20710 Key Skills.
VM20820 Field Study.
VM20910 Fortress of doom, and satellite destruction platforms.
VM30110 Running a country, all you need to know.
VM30220 Heroes, and how to deal with them.
VM30320 The role of the specialist, and how to treat them.
VM30410 Tutorial.
VM30510 Planning and strategic management.
VM30630 Dissertation.
VM30710 Key Skills.
VM30810 General course over few, the key points.
Optional module PS20420: Psychiatry, "Dyslexia plus" A look at the foibles, habits, eccentricities and faults of many world leaders from fact and fiction. How to make your problems work for you!
Faculty of Social Science VM10110 Evil Over lordship an introduction. Time Allowed: THREE hours There are five sections in the examination paper. Attempt ALL questions, failure to attempt to answer all questions may lead to an automatic failure.
Intro into Villainous Meglomania 1
Section A - History 1. State three to five prophasies given to historical evil overlords that apparently make them invincible. State the obvious flaws in each. 2. "Turning into a snake never helps". Discuss.
Section B - Design and Technology 1. Explain the value of form over function in Imperial technology. Discuss the problems this causes by considering stormtrooper armour, walking vehicles and large pits with narrow walkways over them. 2. Design an automated/reanimated Legion of Terror that cannot be defeated by the destruction of a single person or machine by a group of heroes. 3. Design a method of execution with at least ten unnecessary complications. Ensure that the last five cannot be observed.
Section C - Aural 1. Produce two completely different forms of evil laughter. Shout NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! at a volume of at least 10 decibels. 2. Tell your life story in three minutes or less.
Section D - science 1. Is it possible to create a superweapon with no weak points (including those discovered by technobabble particles-of-the-week)? 2. Describe ten methods to synthesise the exotic substance which cripples your superpowered enemy. Explain why they would not be discovered at the same time and why each would only work once.
Section E - planning 1. "World domination. The key element - coffee machines that think." (From the Buffy the Vampire Slayer episode 'Restless') Produce a workable plan based on this concept. 2. A primitive tribe is living on the fringe of your empire. Discuss the merits and problems associated with wiping them out (assume two child survivors) and letting them live (assume are unable to resist rallying behind a charismatic human).
Faculty of Social Science
VM20110 Evil Over lordship the facts.
Time Allowed: THREE hours
There are five sections in the examination paper. Attempt ALL questions, a failure to attempt all questions may result in automatic failure, as you obviously lack the attitude required to be a villainous megalomaniac.
Section A - Psychology 1. State three ways you can tell a hero's girlfriend doesn't actually fancy you. 2. Explain how you can remain terrifying to those around you when you are hugely obese and incapable of unassisted movement.
Section B - Design and Technology 1. Design a weapon, torture chamber or throne-room-with-gladiatorial-arena which does not obey the law of poetic justice. 2. Design a suit of armour which can be varied in at least five ways during mass production, thus overcoming the 'endless drones vs hero' law.
Section C- Aural 1. Imagine that your examiner is a hero you plan to have killed during the night. Talk to him for five minutes without revealing this through innuendo. 2. prepare a short speech explaining why the hero is just like you, that could be used when he is about to kill you.
Section D - Science 1. Explain the 'Skynet theory' of computers and robots. Discuss how this relates to Microsoft. 2. Without magic, explain how a castle can sustain a permanent thunderstorm over itself.
Section E - Planning 1. 'The more incompetent the soldiers, the larger the empire they can carve out'. What is the ideal balance between trooper intellect and empire size? Explain your answer. 2. Suggest a legitimate, legal way to seize power and become an evil overlord. 3. How can an escape route be devised that does not simply isolate the overlord, allowing the hero to kill him in a duel?
Post Graduate Work and courses within the Faculty of Villainous Megalomania
The Faculty offers complete post-grad work in any field chosen. The following awards are possible:
ME(Master of Evil)|MSc/Econ?|MBA|MMSc (Master of Mad Science) DE(Doctor of Evil)|DVM (Doctor of Villainous Megalomania)|PhDDMSc? (Doctor of Mad Science)|
Masters and post -grad work submitted
ME (Master of Evil) Research into the advantages of not explaining why you're being evil/ what your master plan is to the hero, and just killing the little twerp instead.
Communist Dictatorship- seven ways to make yourself popular by killing people. MSc/Econ?
Amassing a fortune and an undead army with out attracting the attention of the neighbours. MBA
Total World Domination with Practical Project PhD?.
How to stop long lost sons destroying you and your empires plans.
( These papers are thanks to John.
We would also like to blame Geoff for giving us the idea for this.
Also this is not a real degree, yet. )
Introductory speech by Head of Faculty, 2003
Good afternoon, students, and welcome to the course.
This is module VM10110, so those of you in the wrong room are advised to leave now. Right? Good. This three-year course will cover a variety of areas, and examine the major aspects of totalitarianism, conquest, manipulation and command. I will tell you now that there are only 50 graduates of this course permitted per year, so those of you wishing to complete it will have to work quite hard. There are 102 of you booked on the course, but I’m sure that between you you can come to some… arrangement.
This gentleman to my left, henceforth referred to as “Thug”, will be weeding out those who are on the wrong course, or who lack the basic mindset required. Starting from after this lecture next week, he will be making attempts on your lives, random targets, random times. That gives you a week to prepare, so I don’t expect too many problems. Those of you worried about exams and credit will note in the handout that proof of the incapacitation of “Thug”, by any means, is worth 20 credits.
While you are in the first year, please refrain from using explosive and otherwise indiscriminate devices on campus, especially in this lecture theatre. The Biology department has also asked that breeding of bio-minions, including carnivorous plants, not begin until the second semester. Recruiting of private armies and gangs from amongst the other students is allowable, as long as only temporary measures of control are used. This means no cybernetic implants, psychosurgery, or nanotech. And especially no gene-tailored viruses. Some of you may have noticed the rather unusual video projector in this room. Yes, that is a heart, and it is still conscious. Clive was the last student to try using nanotech on campus. Acceptable measures of control include psychic influence, blackmail, information terrorism and cash. If you are uncertain of any method, feel free to try it and see if you get away with it.
The library has a good stock of textbooks, but bear in mind that last years students may have booby-trapped them. Sun Tsu, Machievelli and Wheatly are in the historical section instead. Those of you planning secret lairs in the surrounding area, please wait until the module on “Lairs and Bases” starts, for a few guidelines and useful contacts. Now, any questions?
Yes, you in the encounter suit. Yes, this lecture hall is fully shielded, from psi, magic, electromagnetics and blasts. Also earthquakes, trans-time viewers, and so on. Anyone killing the cleaner out of sheer paranoia will take his place. Third row, black top. Well, you can try. Standard rules apply, if you succeed, well done, if you fail, never heard of you. “Don’t Get Caught”. You. No, you with the glowing eyes. Tutorial groups will be posted to your private e-mail accounts, you’re divided by DNA similarity. Those without DNA will be with Doctor R’clch’rrl’k. Right, for the rest of this period, we will look at the philosophy behind Evil Overlord-Ship, starting with the needs of the proletariat…
2008 Course and module synopses
Year 1 VM10110 – Introduction to the general theory behind becoming a successful Evil Overlord. Includes basic background reading, mimetic implantation, course concepts, and “guidelines” to be followed.
VM10220 – Basic Minions The introduction to the many and varied hordes of minions used by Evil Overlords the multiverse over. Featuring insectoid hives, faceless armies of identical soldiers, robotic legions, the walking dead, clones, and many others. Includes historical examples, organisational techniques, and basic logistics.
VM10310 – Castles of Power Looking at castles, dungeons, labyrinths, satellites, small asteroids, and other venues, for use as and conversion to covert and overt bases of operations. With historical examples, possible power sources, some of the more popular designs, and some reliable companies of builders and interior decorators.
VM10410 – Tutorial Our experienced faculty, many of them retired from the Evil Overlord business after years of successful practise, discuss your progress, look over your designs, listen to your ranting and set practical and personalised projects.
VM10520 – Basic Science A simple grounding in basic biology, chemistry and physics. Designed to plug any holes in your knowledge that would otherwise cause e.g. your master plan being disabled due to salt corrosion.
VM10610 – Evil Overlords and the Media How to manipulate your public image, control the flow of information, and make sure everyone not only knows what you want them to know, but agrees with it. Also introduces a specialist minion, the Spin Doctor.
VM10710 – Dark Magics Looking at thaumaturgy, gramarye, nethermancy, necromancy, and psionics. How to manipulate magical energies, recognise and construct magical beasts, and a detailed look at the advantages and pitfalls of this engaging and rewarding field of study.
VM10810 – Linguistic skills Looking at and developing many of the practical oral skills of the Evil Overlord, including the Voice of Command, the three minute life story, Behold My Evil Plan, and the ever-popular evil laughter. Featuring guest lecturers and practical workshops.
VM10920- History of Evil Overlords A look at some of our past Alumni, including their rises to power, organisational techniques, successful campaigns, and where they went wrong. Also features several historical problems faced, and scenarios to be dealt with in a series of practical workshops.
120 credits total
Year 2 VM20220 – Advanced Minions Elite guards, officer corps, specialist teams, and personal bodyguards. How to acquire, control and command your more intelligent minions. How to balance initiative vs obediance. High level organisation, supply of vital weaponry and equipment, and the maintenance of morale.
VM20310 – Citadels of Doom The follow-on from VM10310, advanced bases. Looks at large scale operations, including pocket planes, tesseractopoli, fortress planets, and alternate dimensions. Includes guides to organising on that scale, and a list of useful quantum mechanics.
VM20410 – Tutorial Our experienced faculty, many of them retired from the Evil Overlord business after years of successful practise, discuss your progress, look over your designs, listen to your ranting and set practical and personalised projects.
VM20520 – Advanced Science Featuring electronics, nuclear physics, genetics, robotics and other useful fields. Many of these will be employed either by or against you, so this is a required module. Includes practical demonstrations and workshops.
VM20610 – MegaCorps? New this year, a look at the Evil Overlord CEO. How to use a company as minions, beurocracy as a weapon, and become very rich while doing things to make other people very poor. Includes the uses of major corporations with other plans, and a look at boardroom and council manipulation.
VM20710 – The Dwellers Beyond Whether demons, things from dimension X, space aliens, or Outsiders, many Evil Overlords are required to interact with things outside their influence. At the time anyway… This module covers several historical cases of this, along with diplomatic techniques, demonic bargains and knowledge transfers. With guest lecturers.
VM20820 – Basic Heroes How to spot the rise of heroes in your area of control. Several basic forms and variations, including their weak spots (physical, stylistic, and mental). Basic techniques on their identification, capture and elimination.
VM21020 – Field Course A chance to practise some of the skills learnt so far. Taking place over the 2nd/3rd year summer holidays, you will have a chance to carve a small demesne from a peaceful and unsuspecting country, in competition with your fellow students.
120 credits total.
Year 3 VM30220 – Elite Minons Personal dragons, pet demons, trusted lieutenants and other “right-hand men”. How to ensure they are kept happy and to not rebel at an inconvenient time. Recognising signs of mutinous behaviour, acquiring proof of loyalty, and discerning the precise amount of power to be delegated.
VM30410 – Tutorial Our experienced faculty, many of them retired from the Evil Overlord business after years of successful practise, discuss your progress, look over your designs, listen to your ranting and set practical and personalised projects.
VM30520 – Mad Science Dealing with eugenics, quantum mechanics, strange particles, biotechnology, hyperspace, and anything else the lecturer thinks up. Includes practical demonstrations and workshops in our pocket dimension.
VM30620 – Advanced Heroes The God-touched, national leaders, Super-Teams and other high level pests. Weak spots and other methods of attack (social, familial, religious). Includes counter-infiltration techniques, double-agents within their organisation, and turning the arrogant little buggers to your side.
VM30710 – Military Conquest Some useful techniques for tactical and strategic conquest, including logistics, training and deployment, and recognising the flaws in your plans. Includes resource flexibility, management of personal risk, and selecting loyal generals.
VM30810 – l’Eminence Gris The subtle art of becoming an Evil Overlord in control of all you survey, while apparently being someone else entirely. The study of figureheads, cut-out minions, misdirection, the FUD principle, and beurocracy. Also covers secret identities, mysterious titles, methods of concealment and several historical examples.
VM31030 – Dissertation Field study, laboratory work or literature review. Examples of previous successful dissertations include “Population dynamics of a zombie plague in the field” (2000), “Simple Bio-minions from kitchen ingrediants” (2002) and “The historical evolution of deliberate mistakes in summoning rituals as an exercise in copyright protection” (2003). Discuss any ideas you may have with your tutor, for viability and applicability.
120 credits total.
Many other modules are available for the 2nd and 3rd years of the course, with the Political Science, Sociology, Physics, and History departments. Consult your tutor.