By the necrotic left testicle of Vivamort
By the swinging cod of St. John
Any reference to Humact's 'Rod of Smiting' or 'Mighty Sword'
"Strong enough to drop Morvana's knickers"
Colder than Morvana's [redacted]/tits/nipples/knickers
Hornier than Bast on heat
By Sordan's spiked codpiece
Dirtier than Crofter's chamberpot
Clammy as a zombie cock
"Glowing like a light-elf's sheet stains"